Bundle of Joy alert: Woman claims Justin Bieber is the father of her child.

Publication: Star

Date: 14 Nov. 2011

Back in the 1990s, Bill Clinton's penis got him in so much trouble it got its own nickname, the Clenis.

Here in the 2010s, we may have to start referring to the Bienis.  Star has uncovered a young woman who says Justin Bieber is the father of her child.  Here are the headlines.

• Justin Bieber is the father of my baby!
• World exclusive
• Baby Tristin and mom Mariah
• 20-year-old's shocking lawsuit
• Where they met
• The paternity test
• 'He told me it was his first time'
• Official court documents

This might become one of the major scoops of the year if it isn't complete nonsense.  This blog takes a wait and see approach at present.

Bundles of joy alert: Pictures of Mariah Carey's twins.

Publication: Weekly Life & Style

Date: 7 Nov. 2011

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon get the best kind of publicity possible in the gossip rags, picture of them and their pretty, healthy babies.  Best wishes to all involved.

Bundle of Joy Alert: Mariska Hargitay adopts second child in six months.

Publication: People
Date: 31 Oct. 2011

Mariska Hargitay, seen here with Amaya Josephine, the baby she adopted earlier this year, has adopted a baby boy she and her husband Peter Hermann have named Andrew Nicholas. There is no slew of bad publicity Ms. Hargitay is trying to get off the front page of the gossip rags, so this does not count as "pulling a Bullock".

Nice names and nice babies. Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alert: January Jones and her new baby.

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 31 Oct. 2011

Welcome to gossip hell, January Jones! The actress and animal rights activist, best known as Betty Draper on Mad Men and also as Emma Frost in this year's X-Men: First Class, gave birth to a baby boy a few weeks back. Usually, a pregnant and attractive young actress is exactly the kind of story the tabloids love, but Miss Jones is not married and not forthcoming on who the father is. Here are the headlines.

• January Jones: first baby photos
• Who's the daddy?

Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alert: Jessica Alba and her new baby.

Publication: People
Date: 17 Oct. 2011

Fresh trash tomorrow! Last trash of the week... right now!

Jessica Alba had a new baby named Haven two months ago and there are pictures in People, but I couldn't find any online except her pushing a stroller, the new baby never visible. Instead, here is a picture of Ms. Alba and her first baby Honor, who is obviously much older than two months in this picture.

Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alert: How the baby changed Alyssa.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 10 Oct. 2011

Welcome to gossip hell, Alyssa Milano! It might be more fitting to say welcome to gossip heck, since Ms. Milano gets the nicest type of story, one where a happily married actress gets to introduce her healthy baby boy Milo to the world. There were no stories about her being pregnant, but that is not uncommon when dealing with actresses best known for TV shows now off the air.

Best wishes to Alyssa and Milo and their whole family.

Bells Are Ringing Alert™ and Bundle of Joy alert: Chaz Bono wedding and adoption plans.

Publication: Star
Date: 19 Sept. 2011

This story does not mention Dancing With The Stars, but I assume Chaz Bono will be getting more stories in The Only Ten Magazines That Matter as long as he is part of that competition. The Star reports on his wedding plans to longtime girlfriend Jennifer Elia and their plans to adopt.

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Why I came back to TV.

Publication: Us Weekly

Date: 12 Sept. 2011



Welcome to gossip hell, Sarah Michelle Gellar! Us Weekly gives her a semi-pleasant introduction to the supermarket checkout rags, mentioning that she's a new mom - always a plus - and explaining why she is returning to TV on a new series called Ringer, which will air on the CW network.

Bundle of Joy Alert: Tia Mowry's baby boy Cree.

Publication: Us Weekly

Date: 5 Sept. 2011



Welcome to gossip hell, Tia Mowry! It's more appropriate to call it gossip heck, because the star of the 90s sitcom Sister, Sister makes her supermarket rag debut this decade as the mother of a cute and healthy baby named Cree, the most positive kind of story the gossip rags carry.



Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alert: First pictures of Eloise Joni Richards.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 1 August 2011

It's been nearly a half year since I used the Pulling A Bullock™ label, the idea that a female celebrity adopts a baby who has been on the bad side of publicity adopts a baby, possibly with the intention of getting some positive press. While the gossip rags wrote that others were going to do it, notably Eva Longoria and Jennifer Aniston, so far those have been unsubstantiated rumors.

Enter Denise Richards, former wife of famous hot mess Charlie Sheen. She has adopted a five week old baby girl and has named her Eloise Joni.

Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alert: First pictures of Harper Seven Beckham

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 1 August 2011

The first pictures of the new baby of Victoria and David Beckham, a girl named Harper Seven Beckham, are being published worldwide this week. I nicked this copy from an Australian newspaper, and it's the same as the one on the cover of Weekly Life & Style. Mom is not shown.

Best wishes to all concerned.

Bundle of Joy Alerts: A boy for Kate, a girl for Victoria

Publication: OK!
Date: 25 July 2011

Victoria Beckham had a baby girl, named her Harper Seven. This is her fourth child.

While she and her husband David Beckham are handsome people, I never thought they were good at maths. Fortunately, the silly name is a middle name and can be kept under wraps while at school.

Kate Hudson had a baby boy. Gave him the relatively normal name of Ryder Russell.

Best wishes to all concerned.